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Saturday Night Live - Season 40

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JAY-Z isn’t the only one who made a statement on the 35th season premier of Saturday Night Live last night (September 30).

While Hov rocked a blacked-out “Colin K” jersey in solidarity with (still jobless) Colin Kaepernick, SNL cast member Michael Che destroyed Donald Trump for his ridiculous behavior on Twitter throughout the week. From insulting the entire NFL to the whole island of Puerto Rico, Che and cohost Colin Jost didn’t let it slide during the ‘Weekend Update’ segment.

After reading Trump’s tweets claiming San Juan’s mayor had been “nasty” to him, Che said:

“Oh, really, Donald, you bitch? Was she nasty to you? How nasty? Are you shaking? You want to go smoke a Virginia Slim until your hand stops moving?

“This isn’t that complicated, man. It’s hurricane relief. These people need help. You just did this for white people, twice. Do the same thing. Go tell Melania to put on her flood heels, get some bottled water, some food. Pack up some extra Atlanta Falcons Super Bowl T-shirts. And write them a check with our money, you cheap cracker.”

And he had more smoke for NBA commissioner Adam Silver:

“The commissioner of the NBA said that he expected players to follow league rules and stand during the national anthem.

“O.K. The NBA is, what, 130, 140 percent black? What exactly are you going to do if they all decide to kneel? Have a game between the New York Porzingis and the San Antonio Ginobili? And how did this guy get to become commissioner in the first place? He looks like somebody put a suit on a sex doll.”

“You know, it’s hard to ask black people to respect the flag when we know that this country cares more about it than us, O.K.? And we love the flag. It’s just that white guys really love the flag. The only people I’ve seen love their flag more than white dudes are gay guys and the Bloods.

“And it’s not personal – you’ve just got to understand. There’s 50 stars on the American flag. But black people, we only feel welcome in, like, eight. Some of them stars we still don’t know too much about. That’s why if you ask a black person, does he love America, we’ll be like, ‘Hey, I love Brooklyn. I’m still reserving judgment on the Dakotas.’”

Oh, and you guessed it, the White people on Twitter are extra salty.

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